It just seems like dating is a stacked deck. If you like someone, you're not supposed to show it. If you want the person to occasionally call you, then you're considered needy or dependent. If I initiate contact, then I'm being pushy and annoying (and breaking the golden rule of
not showing someone that you like them).
I made a mistake (I think) earlier this week and went off on a man who I thought was blowing me off--I hadn't talked to him for five days, more than a week if you don't count text messages! And I had left a voice message on his cell the morning before. Busy or not, anyone can find five minutes to call or send a message saying "Hey...thinking about you. Really busy. Call you when I return home." Is that really too much to ask? He responded furiously, saying that his out-of-town work assignment ran longer than expected (but didn't bother to tell me that) and that he had a friend in the hospital (ditto) and that he resented my accusation and told me he doesn't want to see me again. I apologized profusely, but to no avail.
Originallly, I was devastated. I really liked this guy--attractive, intelligent, passionate, creative--and I thought the feeling was mutual. But for someone who worked in communications for a living, his interpersonal communication skills are sorely lacking. I could feel him putting up walls, and saying things like --I have to "earn" his affection/trust/whatever (whaaaa??!). Maybe once he knew I was into him, he lost interest. And we're both control freaks, so maybe this was destined to fail. What sucks is that we had a lot in common--art, music, media, travel--I still can't shake the fact that we could have been a great couple.
I was in the wrong for going for his jugular. But he gave me no indication after our first date that he really wanted to pursue this. Why do people have to play games? If you're not interested in me then tell me and stop wasting my time and yours. If you are interested, then LET'S. MAKE. THIS. HAPPEN! Getting to know a potential love interest is always so much harder than it has to be. Pisses me off... *sigh*
